Author Topic: Headlines from the year 2030!lol  (Read 4091 times)

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Offline RLI

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Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« on: March 09, 2014, 02:08:21 PM »


G'day Trendsetters,

For a bit of a laugh, i thought i would share this with you, if you haven't seen it, it is a bit of laugh! lol

Regards,

RLI

Headlines from the year 2030
 

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world "Little MIDDLE-EAST" formerly known as Australia.

Tasmania executes last remaining Greenie.

White minorities still trying to have English recognised as Australia's third language.

Children from two-parent heterosexual families bullied in schools for being 'different'. Tolerance urged.

Gay Marriages now overtake heterosexual marriages as preferred 'lifestyle' choice.

Melbourne schoolgirl expelled for not wearing Burqa, being a Christian is no excuse says school. Sharia law must be enforced.

Japan announces that they will no longer consume whale meat as whales are now extinct and the scientific research fleet are unemployed. Australian Government has told the Japanese that Cane Toads taste like whale meat.

Australia now has ten Universities of Political Correctness.

Professor Goldman of ANU says there is still a long way to go in the fight to stop free speech.

Australian Deficit $10 trillion dollars and rising. Government declares return to surplus in 100 years which is 300 years ahead of time. Prime Minister Mohammed Yousuf claims increased growth through more immigration is the secret to success.

Wall Street banks merge to form new super bank, Goldman, Rothschild, Ebeneezer, Epstein & Drescher (GREED).

Huge bonuses paid to executives to celebrate launch.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists amazed.

Iran still quarantined. Physicists estimate it will take at least 50 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Islamic Countries. No other country volunteers to come forward to help the beleaguered nation ! Serves them right.

Castro finally dies at age 112. Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

Jose Manuel Rodrigez Bush says he will run for second term as US President in 2032.

Australia Post raises price of stamps to $18 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

After a ten year $75.8 billion study, commissioned by the Labor Party, scientists prove diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of an Australian drops to 115 kgs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Victoria India and New South Iraq.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Senate still blocking drilling in Canberra even though petrol is selling for 5,000 Rupees per litre and petrol stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights. Victims to be held partly responsible for crimes committed against them.

Average height of professional basketball players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons.

Australian Tax Office sets lowest tax rate in decades at 75%.

AFL Carlton won this years National Footy final beating the Hindu Hornets 20-11 to 13-18. NRL Arab bulldogs beat Asia Brisbane 22 to 16.

Southern Asia (formerly Northern Territory ) voters still having trouble with voting machines . . . ..

Regards,

RLI

 :cheers:
The Halls been rented, the Bands been paid, time to see you dance Pilgrim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline jetcrew

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Re: Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2014, 03:34:12 PM »
Pretty stupid really IMHO  ??? ???

 (not saying you wrote it mate  ;D ;D ;D

Jet ;D ;D
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Offline Brutus

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Re: Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2014, 04:12:59 PM »

Tasmania executes last remaining Greenie.


Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut.



I loved these two in particular

Offline ATC

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Re: Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« Reply #3 on: March 09, 2014, 04:19:24 PM »
RLI - curious do you have 2 accounts?

RLI - Profile

Mattky - Profile

The profile pictures look similar.

Offline RLI

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Re: Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« Reply #4 on: March 09, 2014, 04:42:23 PM »
RLI - curious do you have 2 accounts?

RLI - Profile

Mattky - Profile

The profile pictures look similar.


G'day ATC,

Fark, i hope not, i think one of me is enough for the world.lol

PS, no mate, the only forums that i am active on is this forum, ShadowSpear Special Operations forum and the Patrol 4x4.

Regards,

Paul (RLI)
 :cheers:
The Halls been rented, the Bands been paid, time to see you dance Pilgrim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline RLI

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Re: Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« Reply #5 on: March 09, 2014, 04:44:17 PM »
Pretty stupid really IMHO  ??? ???

 (not saying you wrote it mate  ;D ;D ;D

Jet ;D ;D

G'day jetcrew,

I am not talented enough to write such dribble. lol

Regards,

RLI
 :cheers:
The Halls been rented, the Bands been paid, time to see you dance Pilgrim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline RLI

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Re: Headlines from the year 2030!lol
« Reply #6 on: March 09, 2014, 04:46:41 PM »
I loved these two in particular

G'day Brutus,

No comment, on the grounds that my wife might kill me. lol

Regards,

RLI
 :cheers:
The Halls been rented, the Bands been paid, time to see you dance Pilgrim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!