Isn't it funny how ....
- After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
- Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
-The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act
- If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
- If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the very next morning you will have a flat tyre.
- If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).
- When the body is fully immersed in bath water, the telephone rings.
-The probability of meeting someone you know , increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
- When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will...
- The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
- At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies, and stay to the bitter end of the performance.
- As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
- If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
- The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
- As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.