Author Topic: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes  (Read 11917 times)

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Offline hookedon4wding

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UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« on: June 21, 2011, 09:19:51 AM »
Last night I was reading an article in the latest 4X4 Australia Magazine about a couple of UHF 'foot in mouth' episodes that happened on one of their recent trips.

The convoy had been within range of a couple of older guys supposedly having one of the most boring conversations ever. When the convoy turned off one of the guys said "thank god we don't have to listen to those boring guys anymore" only to have one of those guys chime back in to say they could still hear them.

I'm sure plenty of you guys/girls have had similar foot in mouth moments when chatting on the UHF and thought it could be a good fun topic to share a few. 

The floor is yours...

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #1 on: June 21, 2011, 09:29:32 AM »
Ive never had that happen, but at the moment on ch 7 there is a called "Terry" who has a serious mental illness. He is on the airwaves allday swearing and carrying on, scans every now and again and mimics shyte.
This bloke is a fair dinkum pest to the point where i cant use my UHF when the kids are in the car because the language used is obscene.
Your not too far from me so i would not be surprised if you have heard him.


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Offline hookedon4wding

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #2 on: June 21, 2011, 09:45:53 AM »
Yep, I know who you're talking about. PITA!


Offline singo-26

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #3 on: June 21, 2011, 10:55:06 AM »
There is a bloke in Sydney who does a radio show on chanel 40. The truckies love him.  ??? ???

Back when 27Mhz was the thing to have and UHF was just starting to take holdI was travelling with 2 other cars. @ of us had UHF and the other had just purchased a 27Mhz unit. I think the bloke with the 27Mhz was breathing through the microphone as every minute he was commenting on something. Myself and the other bloke had been commenting on the UHF about him for some thime when someone picked up the wrong microphone and got half way through what they were saying before realising which radio they were transmitting on. It went fairly quiet on the 27Mhz after that.  ;D ;D ;D
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Offline Red Dog 4x4

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #4 on: June 21, 2011, 11:31:16 AM »
Going back a few years now... I would have been maybe 12-13 at the time the family ( aunts and uncles ) were all heading up to Harvey bay for a week on the way up we were all Talking on the UHF about the slow person in front of us 80kph in a 100 zone ( not in our convoy ) but thay had what looked like a goat in the back of the Ute. My mother got on a said " looks like he is taking his wife to the markets to sell '' then we get the come back " Na its my husband got tied of him eating my veggie patch"....needless to say it all we very quiet for a little while, but she had a good sense of humour and we chatted for another 20 odd min after that and she turned off and wished us a safe trip.

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Offline Bird

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #5 on: June 21, 2011, 11:33:23 AM »
Quote from: singo-26
There is a bloke in Sydney who does a radio show on chanel 40. The truckies love him.  ??? ???
"whats going on out thereeeeeee.............."he is east coast wide - Ive heard him in Qld, Melb and NSW...
Thus why I havent turned the UHF on in the City limits in 5+ years.
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Offline D4D

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #6 on: June 21, 2011, 11:40:36 AM »
Yep, they recently turned back on the Ch7 MEL repeater, however they will probably turn it off again due to the abuse.
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Offline Nutto

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #7 on: June 21, 2011, 01:04:45 PM »
Hmmm
Yep, there was one occassion where a convoy of 2 of us were travelling, and were on Ch18 (not sure why, we are normally on 10, or 40 for call points out west).  Anyways - we caught up to a couple of nomads towing their houses at about 80 clicks.    Without thinking, I piped up to the other party I was travelling with and said " Ahh the ole Caravan Utilising Nomadic Travellers....."   Then turned to the missus and remarked " S h i t e, I'm on 18 - hope they see the funny side...".  :-[   Then followed silence for a few minutes before I piped up "Morning all", to which I got a solemn "Morning". followed by more silence, before eventually bit of a chat ensued with no mention of my lil "fox paa" ;D ;D ;D

 :cheers:
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Offline hgmonaro

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #8 on: June 21, 2011, 01:32:24 PM »
We were travelling along the road to Gunlom falls in Kakadu.  Passed a car coming towards us with accompanying dust cloud.  We had just come off the tar and I noticed that the car had his lights on so I flicked mine on thinking that's a good idea.  As we negotiate his dust cloud I see a flash of another vehicle right up his clacker (no lights on) and moments later over the UHF something like "smart move to put your lights on after going past a car" (actual wording wouldn't pass the profanity filters).  I quickly shot back "smart idea to travel so close to a car without your lights on... dickhead".  Didn't hear another peep out of them (I quickly scanned channels incase they had changed)

My mother-in-law said something less than comlimentary about the town of Coober Pedy as they drove in only to have someone reply "Well f... off then".  Apparently (I wasn't with them, they were talking to my sis-in-law and husband) my father-in-law thought it was funny!

Offline Hairs

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #9 on: June 21, 2011, 02:48:43 PM »
Traveling down the the Pacific H/way near Woodburn, two truckies over the uhf yaking to each in the most colourful language. Obviously they knew each other.
Out of the blue a voice says
"Hey you pair, want cut the language a bit? my MRS in the cab with me"
A voice pipes up "Why, Is she to old ugly to kiss goodbye?"

Another one was we had just turned out of the Evans Head rd at Woodburn onto the H/way heading south when a truckie informs every one that a White Candy Car has pulled up at the cafe opposite the river, we drive past and there he is parked. A coupe seconds later an other truckie announces he is still there sitting in his car, another says he has eyeballed him still sitting. Then out of nowhere a voice says,
"Morning Boys"
To which a truckie replies,
" Morning Officer, just making sure you are alright Sir, you car hasn't by any chance broken down sir?"
The Copper replies
" Your concern is noted, everything is fine thank you, now have a good day boys"
There was silence for about twenty minutes after that.

If all of the foul language could be removed it would be the funnest thing to listen to most days.
 ;D


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Offline swanny

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #10 on: June 21, 2011, 03:36:23 PM »
Again in Sydney, there is a bloke on CH 40/29 who gives all the truckies a real hard time, U can pick him up when u are coming into Colo Heights way, he goes by the call sign of Nick Smith, if i recall right, he is very calm about the way he hangs Shit on them, and never gets emotional, just keeps plugging away with his slagging of how the are all cowboys etc etc.

Awesome to listen to, (depending if your a truckie or not) never swears or is abusive, very articulate about how he explains himself, but he gets the desired results, truckies are triping over themselves trying to give him a gob full. Very funny at times.

Offline dno

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #11 on: June 21, 2011, 03:59:33 PM »
We got one down here in Melb, is known as Sparrow. Im sure a few others would have heard him.
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Offline Brett B

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #12 on: June 21, 2011, 04:50:47 PM »
Is he still at it Sparrow's been around for about 20 Years then
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Offline Slain

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #13 on: June 21, 2011, 05:29:33 PM »
Toowoomba region is fantastic for a laugh. every day around midday and 4pm the same bloke jumps on every day without fail and announces several times "i have a big co*k", the come backs from truckies are hilarious!

the other day would have to have been the worst i have heard, some indian bloke jumped on telling everyone to "f*** off out of his country and that he is a true australian instead of these white c***s that invaded the land. And i do know he is indian as he told everyone. the arguments went on for that long that i turned the uhf off.

Offline speewa158

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #14 on: June 21, 2011, 05:58:02 PM »
Down our way the local village idiot calls himself Bullbar , He constantly proclaims the emench bulk he has been blessed with . He drowns on & on the same thing everytime . Dead set  1/2wit
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Offline Bill

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #15 on: June 21, 2011, 06:34:42 PM »
Headed up the Cape a couple years ago.
One of our party was ranting and raving over the UHF about caravans and camper trailers on the road. I don't know why as they were not bothering us.
Finally a voice came on explaining to her that caravans and camper trailers have as much right to the road as she did.
Best thing I ever heard over the UHF was when a car was stolen in town. Everyone with a UHF was reporting where it was until the police could catch up to it...
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Offline Heiny

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #16 on: June 21, 2011, 06:43:35 PM »
Ive never had that happen, but at the moment on ch 7 there is a called "Terry" who has a serious mental illness. He is on the airwaves allday swearing and carrying on, scans every now and again and mimics shyte.
This bloke is a fair dinkum pest to the point where i cant use my UHF when the kids are in the car because the language used is obscene.
Your not too far from me so i would not be surprised if you have heard him.


Cheers BD
Used to have these oxygen thieves on the UHF most days when I used to operate a grader, one used to make a point of letting you know that your tax dollars supported his substance abuse and his time spent irritatating the living f@%k out of everybody >:(

Down our way the local village idiot calls himself Bullbar , He constantly proclaims the emench bulk he has been blessed with . He drowns on & on the same thing everytime . Dead set  1/2wit
Speewa with any luck he will meet with a bullbar one day >:D
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Offline Bushman

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #17 on: June 21, 2011, 07:04:44 PM »
There is a bloke in Sydney who does a radio show on chanel 40. The truckies love him.  ??? ???

Yeah most would love to kill him, calls himself Nick Harris and his sidekick 001 and thinks he owns the airwaves the pair of them are wankers,...



On another note, prior to me having a UHF mounted in the Pathie when we had it, we had a loan of a hand held while on group days trip, eventually the leader of the trip (owner of the radio) stopped came back to me and switched off the voice activation  :-[  luckly we weren't saying anything we shouldn't have.


Back in the days of AM CB Radio my parents neighbour use to listen to the footy on the radio on Saturday  afternoon  sometime I'd be out front chatting to my mate over the CB, one day the neighbour came out and asked "seeing your mate is going to the shop can he get my fish'n'chips" yep everything we said came over his radio in the house.
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Offline Bushman

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #18 on: June 21, 2011, 07:15:42 PM »
Again in Sydney, there is a bloke on CH 40/29 who gives all the truckies a real hard time, U can pick him up when u are coming into Colo Heights way, he goes by the call sign of Nick Smith, if i recall right, he is very calm about the way he hangs **** on them, and never gets emotional, just keeps plugging away with his slagging of how the are all cowboys etc etc.

Awesome to listen to, (depending if your a truckie or not) never swears or is abusive, very articulate about how he explains himself, but he gets the desired results, truckies are triping over themselves trying to give him a gob full. Very funny at times.

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Offline baldheadedgit

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #19 on: June 21, 2011, 07:40:26 PM »
That guy has been going for years now,,, I'm sure Nick Harris is the one he puts Shit on all the time,, from memory Nick Harris lives, or lived around Parramatta, and was very active in UHF from day dot,, but like all things fun,, it went south,,, and Nick and the guy from Berowra have been feuding for many years,,, from time to time there ad's are broadcast over the airwaves..
His little sessions do tend to go on for hours on end, he must have one hell of a location up there as his signal can be picked up for many many miles..............
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Offline Beachman

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #20 on: June 21, 2011, 08:22:36 PM »
Couple of years ago we went camping at the beach with another 6 cars. I was the lead car and headed to our usual spot, but it was already taken.
So I stop outside their camp and  jump in the UHF to tell my group it was taken ,( but I keep the volume of my UHF turned up high)  But I get this reply back from the last car  in our group to tell them to F off as it’s our spot.
As imagined they heard the reply so have to give a quick apology and sheepishly drive off. 

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #21 on: June 21, 2011, 09:44:57 PM »
Years ago on a trip "around the block", our two vehicles were driving through a one horse town out west when the wives got talking about what a terrible place it'd be to live in. After a "robust" discussion about the perceived shortfalls of the place, a very "local" voice came on to tell us they loved the place and we weren't all that welcome to share it with them. We sheepishly drove on!
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Offline Kit_e_kat9

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #22 on: June 21, 2011, 10:48:49 PM »


We get alot of "crows" on CH7 up this way.

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Offline Matto

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #23 on: June 22, 2011, 01:12:40 PM »
And this would have to be why my UHF is the least-used thing I've ever bought for/put on/put in the car.

Back on the topic of funny stories - Hairs' story about the cop is winning hands down, for mine!!!  :cup: :police:

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Offline sandman

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Re: UHF 'Foot in Mouth' episodes
« Reply #24 on: June 22, 2011, 02:52:46 PM »
Toowoomba region is fantastic for a laugh. every day around midday and 4pm the same bloke jumps on every day without fail and announces several times "i have a big co*k", the come backs from truckies are hilarious!

I live south of Toowoomba and he is also around some nights between 8:30-9:30pm