Wow, I thought I had OCD with cleaning and keeping everything looking factory new 

Ha ha, it's an old photo....

Geoff, post a photo of under the rear of your trailer, and of the tow tongue, and of the bike rack if you already have one. It will make more sense if we talk specifically about your setup, rather than in (drunken) generalisations.
does that mean ignore the pic and put that bolt in the same spot at 45 deg, but underneath the locking pin not above as shown in the pic?
Yes, Put the bolt underneath the tube, and as far forward as possible. But, for a bike rack, the same position as pictured will do the job.
is that connected to a car - not a trailer? is that just to illustrate where the pin and bolt go etc...?
Yes, fitted to an 80 series Landcruiser. It's "for illustration purposes only"

sorry for dumb questions mate
No such thing as a dumb question.
You shouldn't need the heavy steel tongue. Simply bolt the bike carrier directly to the male tube section. You should never need to unbolt it You can use a towball as a bolt, or drill more holes and use regular bolts. Bolts might be easier if you don't have a drill/holesaw of the correct size for the towball shaft.
If you have a square hitch receiver on the tow vehicle and wish to also use the bike carrier on the vehicle, simply slide the bolted rack & tube assembly into the vehicle receiver, determine exactly how far in it should go (check clearance of handlebars and pedals to the car bodywork etc) then mark the locating pin holes, remove the assembly and drill the inner tube so you can slide the pin through. Do this FIRST, before fitting the receiver tube to the trailer.
Then slide your new outer tube section onto the assembly, offer it up to the trailer to determine final position, mark it, drill pin holes to match the holes in the inner tube, and weld the trailer receiver tube in place. Depending on the structure at the rear of your trailer, you may need to add some strengthening pieces (hence my request for a photo).
If it works out just too hard to match the locating pin holes between the vehicle and trailer fitups, it's OK to drill a second set of locating pin holes in the inner tube. I'd cut the inner tube section longer than you reckon you'll need it just to give you some room to adjust things. Once everything works, you can trim any excess tube.