A little long but worth a bit of a laugh as well cos there must have been a few who have done a similar thing, i did start an exciting trend but it was very short lived as the penalties were very cruel please read on...
Craziest thing i saw was when i returned to "the Site where it happened".... I was driving an Army truck many, many yrs ago and got bored on a long haul from Bissy to Rocky and beyond. We were in a long drawn out formation mixed with landrovers trucks of all sizes and descriptions ( mine was a MK 5 International ...machinery vehicle, Lathe, 5kva VW Generator and every tool a young eager fitter would want except for a radio they didn't want to spoil us).
Very long story shortened a tad.... 5k's or so from Rocky on a boring, roadkill riddled wide section of road i decided to see how close i could get to a piece of sunbaked 45 degree skippy....
"recovery Veh 3 to fitter 2 that was close, over"
Ahhaaa someones whatchin ... picked another target... "recovery Veh 3 to Fitter 2 your right on the nose, over".... no need to tell you how close that was...
Then i spotted this big red who looked like he belonged in the Nullabor hunting ground ..trouble with this one it was on a sweeping huge bend and off the road about 1.5 mtrs it was big enough area to park 20 semi's with their trailers and the road was clear for miles, so i lined it up and moved off the road, to my left easily 20 mtrs plus or minus, there were stacks of sign posts advertising Rockhamptons tourist and camping facilities but i was too focussed on the size of the target shall we say and thought here we go "WOOMPA" Holy S&*%t ...by the time i got control of the 6 Ton dust canvas covered rattler i was on the opposite side of the road... a couple of cars flashed their lights and i cringed down as low as i could until they had passed.
About 150 mtrs up the road i saw two of the Platoons landrovers pulled over and i sheepishly drove by wide eyed and sweating like a plumber on a roof.... just got passed them then the radio broke it’s silence “ recore ha ha ha yy veh hahahacle 3 to hhaaaa to whiteyyharrrr fitter hhaha2222” Shit...
To this day i have no idea what they said i just pulled over and waited till i got another call and that wasn’t very long at all.
The call was fairly subdued but it still made me shiver with fear ”Fitter 2 .....turn your vehicle around and return to location signpost roadside stop , OVER”
A broken radio message again followed and requested the following Recovery vehicles that were tailing me to go on ahead and wait at check point “Rocky Show grounds” our stop over point for the night “proceed past all the other vehicles and wait at the toilet block area UNLOADED, over ”.
AGAIN to cut the story short i pulled up along side the Platoon Sgt and the three corporals one i’m sure had a wet patch in his crutch area and he and his offsider were peeking around the back of their vehicle to check who i was, they started pissing themselves laughing again when i stepped down off the truck.
He didn’t say a word just put his massive big hairy hand on the top of my head and gently gripped me like a gorilla turning me ever so slowly around until i faced the Rockhampton Show Sign that was advertising the next weeks coming attraction.... IT WAS the other pricks comments that really got him pissed off ... something about “ why aren’t they advertising Gut busting side shows or Rib tickling events... then i really looked at the Sign smack bottom centre was the trailings and bowel remains of Big Red embedded about 50mm into and across the showgrounds major sponsor ...I forget the name but it was the local Abbitoir or butcher and .. then... i think i got a wet patch myself... the punishment i received was funnier than what i did but thats another road travel story.
And skippy he was about 3 days dead and puffed up like a buffalo before “i tried to swerve and miss him Officer” , the tyre marks tracked him under the front arms at the start of the rib cage and the smell......... we had to leave....... quick
