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General => General Discussion => Topic started by: FZJ on September 06, 2011, 08:21:45 PM

Title: common sense........
Post by: FZJ on September 06, 2011, 08:21:45 PM
Ive just been putting together a scooter for my 4yr olds birthday in the morning.Every time i open a new product the warnings get worse, this was a ripper though.....

1st sticker  reads " this product moves when used, exercise caution!"

2nd sticker reads  "this product is a choking hazard"  (for a rhino maybe)

3rd sticker reads ( get the irony in this) "Use common sense when riding". Pity they didnt read that sticker first then the other 2 would have been redundant......

P
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: ralphedward on September 06, 2011, 08:24:51 PM
I had one a while back that stated - (I kid you not) 'use of this product could be dangerous'........
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: craigtempo on September 06, 2011, 08:44:39 PM
yes i have 2 x 1mtr ladders and the warning on them reads .....Do not stand above the first step .

the first step is about 6 inches of the floor .

Craig
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Big Nath on September 06, 2011, 08:51:38 PM
The best one i have ever seen was a "Used By" date on ice...........

WTF!?!?
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: olddigger on September 06, 2011, 08:53:46 PM
Having trouble sleeping a while ago, got some mild sleeping pills from the doc.
Label said: "Caution. These tablets may cause drowsiness."
I should bloody hope so!
Cheers, Tony
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: cruisindub on September 07, 2011, 07:41:58 AM
the old classic,

found on a pack of peanuts......

warning, this pack may contain nuts !!

ha ha
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: mystq on September 07, 2011, 07:45:09 AM
Was travelling through a little country town a few weeks ago and drooped into the takeaway shop to get a coffee. On there notice board the was a sign for firewood, at the bottom it said, "First load of wood save $10, That is a saving of $10"
 ;D
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: rotare on September 07, 2011, 09:24:33 AM
Saw a sign the other day advertising hot dogs, it read:

"buy one for the price of two, and receive a second one free"......wonder how people got caught
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Brij on September 07, 2011, 09:26:09 AM
A proper warning (from  http://archive.bigben.id.au/victoria/site_index.html , quite a good website!)

Signs of the Times

Since the formation of Parks Victoria by the Kennett government there has been a growing trend in "improving" our parks for the "safety" and "comfort" of (international) tourists at the cost of a true outdoor experience.  There is a fine line between such measures and the preservation of the natural experience and in my opinion this line is being crossed on many occasions by parks management.  Perhaps the most obvious is the proliferation of warning signs... so in the interests of public safety I have made up my own warning notice summarising any signs you might see in your travels.
Warning!!!
You are about to enter the real world.
Shit happens!!!

    Wet rocks are slippery. When you slip and fall it will hurt and you may also get wet.
    Branches fall from gum trees, particularly on stormy days. If they hit you on the head it will hurt.
    Gorges, by definition, have very steep sides often forming vertical cliffs. If you walk over the edge of a cliff it will hurt.
    Snow can fall at ANY time of the year in alpine areas. Snow is very cold.
    Ocean waves are unpredictable. It is very hard to stay standing when you're being hit by a tonne of water moving at speed.
    Wildlife can be... well, wild.
    There are no street signs on every tree. If you don't know where you're going you can get lost.

Be prepared, and get over it when it happens. Your safety is in your hands.


Peter
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Matto on September 07, 2011, 10:33:12 AM
I think it was Bill that had something like this in his sig:

"Now, I'm not saying we invoke capital punishment for Stupidity. But how about we just take all the warning labels off everything, and let nature sort itself out?"

Loved it the first time I saw it.
Matto :)
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: earle on September 07, 2011, 11:03:14 AM
My John Deere ride-on mower has lots of warnings in the manual but the funniest one is - 'Do not ride naked'.
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: morgue on September 07, 2011, 06:17:01 PM
Yes, Common Sense, it is slowly getting taken over by "Not My Fault" and coupled with "You to Blame" really make a good statement in civil court...
People just do not want to take responsibility for their own actions anymore...

I believe in one skandernavian country, Norway or Denmark, the amount of trivial civil cases, ie people suing the council to court for tripping over a crack in the footpath, suing council for breaking their neck in the surf because they swam in the rough surf ....you know
Well, it got so bad, that the government set up another civil law panel, with 6 judges, and trivial cases were argued before this panel. The panel would give the OK to go head and try the case in Civil Court or stop it dead in its tracks.
It was within 12 months, that they cut the amount of trivial civil cases by over 80%, so to take a civil case to court, you got to have to know that the case is iron clad.
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: wartim on September 07, 2011, 06:40:11 PM
Common Sense hay?

It's time again for the annual
'Stella Awards'!
 
For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico, where she purchased coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing that, right? That's right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kind
of cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy.


Here are the Stellas for this past year  --  2010:


*SEVENTH PLACE*


Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of
her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably
surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.


Start scratching!


* SIXTH PLACE *

Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps..

Scratch some more...


* FIFTH PLACE *

Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , who was leaving a house
he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut.
Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT days and survive on a case
of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's
insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish Keep scratching. There are more...


Double hand scratching after this one..


*FOURTH PLACE*

Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the
Stella's when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.


Pick a new spot to scratch, you're getting a bald spot..


* THIRD PLACE *

Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a
Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a
spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument. What ever happened to people being responsible for their own actions?


Only two more so ease up on the scratching...



*SECOND PLACE*

Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware sued the owner of a night club in
a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor,
knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses. Go figure.


Ok. Here we go!!  Drum roll ...


* FIRST PLACE *

This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was: Mrs. Merv
Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, who purchased new 32-foot Winnebago motor home.
On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having driven on to
the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the
driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich.  Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned.  Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owners manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down?  $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.
 
Makes you wonder what the world is coming to doesnt it?

Cheers

Wartim
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Lost Dog on September 07, 2011, 07:00:43 PM
Gday all,
There was a warning some time ago in the Husqvarna chainsaws manual that read " Warning! Do not attempt to stop chain with hand or genitals."
Not sure what part of your genitals you would use ??? ??? ??? ???

Cheers
Col
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Hairs on September 07, 2011, 07:11:30 PM
Obituary for
Common Sense

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of Common Sense who has been with us for many years.
 No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
 He will be remembered as having cultivated such value lessons as
knowing when to come in out of the rain,
why the early bird gets the worm,
and that life isn't always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn)
and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
 Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate,
teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch,
and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student,
 but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband;
churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize
that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit on her lap,
and was awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust;
his wife, Discretion;
 his daughter, Responsibility;
 and his son, Reason.

He is survived by two stepbrothers, My Rights and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
 If you still know him pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

- Author Unknown
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: speewa158 on September 07, 2011, 07:21:28 PM
Common ........Sence .........aint what it used to be . Is it really still out there Or has it been Emailed to the either , A Black Hole of reality     :cheers:
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Nomad on September 07, 2011, 07:54:57 PM
I have a wheel barrow that has a warning stating that its not suitable to be towed on a highway.........................
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: speewa158 on September 07, 2011, 08:07:01 PM
Do you have a Treg hitch or 50mm Ball on the barrow  ??? :cheers:
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Nomad on September 07, 2011, 08:09:57 PM
I thought it would be ok just using an ocky strap....maybe just have to put a load of besser offcuts in it to keep it from bouncing around.......
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Symon on September 07, 2011, 08:31:01 PM
Common sense is a myth.  It has never existed nor ever will exist.

If you think you have common sense you are kidding yourself.
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Crosslander on September 07, 2011, 09:25:32 PM
Panadol Infants (less than 12 months) has (or had?) a warning not to operate heavy machinery - I hid my sons Tonka Truck when I gave him some  ;D
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Jon on September 08, 2011, 07:15:37 AM
..maybe just have to put a load of besser offcuts in it to keep it from bouncing around.......

I hope they are not from around a fire place... ;D
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: speewa158 on September 08, 2011, 07:20:54 AM
Jon  I could do you a really nice PDFP so you dont have to use bricks . (Pre Dug Fire Pit ) Just send lots of $ to my PO Box   :cheers:
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Hairs on September 08, 2011, 07:35:09 AM
Panadol Infants (less than 12 months) has (or had?) a warning not to operate heavy machinery - I hid my sons Tonka Truck when I gave him some  ;D
See that's showing common sense.
Well done. You're a responsible adult. Good onya.
 :cup:
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Redback on September 08, 2011, 09:47:10 AM
I have a wheel barrow that has a warning stating that its not suitable to be towed on a highway.........................


And this is why it has that warning
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORcATFYBTZY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORcATFYBTZY)

AND THIS
(http://static3.patentgenius.com/30099/63814/7441791-3.gif)

(http://static3.patentgenius.com/30099/63814/7441791-2.gif)

Baz.
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Nomad on September 08, 2011, 10:14:15 AM
Bahahahahahahahahahahaha................................and the stupid thing is the bloody thing is empty..........they could have put a fourth guy in that............
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: gibbo301 on September 08, 2011, 10:19:14 AM
The 4th passenger must of fallen out of the wheel barrow lol
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Lori on September 08, 2011, 02:39:24 PM
Wartim I think you may find that those stories are not actually true.

Some of the warnings that you read remind me of a character in the book So long and thanks for all the fish from the hitchhikers series Wonko the Sane aka John Watson.

When John saw instructions on how to use a toothpick on a packet of toothpicks he became convinced that the world had gone mad and started calling himself Wonko the Sane because only truley insane people would need instructions on how to use a toothpick!
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Bill on September 08, 2011, 04:16:46 PM
I think it was Bill that had something like this in his sig:

"Now, I'm not saying we invoke capital punishment for Stupidity. But how about we just take all the warning labels off everything, and let nature sort itself out?"

Loved it the first time I saw it.
Matto :)
Yup... That be mine  ;D
I still love it...
Bill
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: Hairs on September 08, 2011, 04:24:33 PM
The Darwin Awards (http://www.darwinawards.com/)
Love that site.
It's natural selection. Ya gotta be happy with that.
(http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-eatdrink008.gif) (http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php)
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: @fnq4now on September 08, 2011, 06:05:44 PM
As per the below statement:-
Title: Re: common sense........
Post by: ralphedward on September 08, 2011, 08:27:27 PM
Common sense is a myth.  It has never existed nor ever will exist.

If you think you have common sense you are kidding yourself.
I know common sense is a myth,  my mythissus told me so!!!!!!!! :cheers: