MySwag.org The Off-road Camper Trailer Forum
General => General Discussion => Topic started by: Campfire on August 20, 2011, 08:42:38 PM
-
Good evening swaggers,
Within a week I expect to be adding to this thread describing how much trouble I am in with the wife.
Like most guys, I enjoy watching a bit of tv or DVD's after long day working and do enjoy a show without too much interruption.
I have a wife who likes to comment on everything and anything regardless of the subject whilst I desire to watch a good movie in peace and quiet.
To add to this burden I have a 11 year old son who is constantly asking me for pocket money.
I thought about this hard, had a man to man chat with my 11 year old son on a business proposition and I think I have found a way to kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
This is for real.
The deal is I will pay my 11 year old son a weekly pocket money allowance, if he jumps in for me and answers all the questions my wife likes to bombard me with. By doing this I don't have to answer mindless boring question after question when watching TV, my son keeps her distracted while I zone out, and he gets pocket money for it. This deal actually started tonight and has been going well for the last 1.5 hours.
I expect sooner or later the wife will find out about this arrangement and my son and I will be in it up to our necks.
I look forward to that first expression on her face when she finds out ( always does), and once again I will be dirt.
Cheers
Campfire
-
Mate..................... your dead...lmao ;D
-
Hope your shed is comfy!
cheers
-
Pretty much everything I do......except when I sling some money towards her. !!!!
-
I would make sure the camper is fully stocked and the car fully fueled ready to clear out! Even I wouldn't be game to try that!
BJ
-
Oooh, this is gunna be goooood ;D ;D :cheers:
-
I can see the amount of pocket money you are paying your son, is just about to increase >:D, so the old lady doesnt find out about the deception. :'(
-
The brilliant thing about this plan is she will never expect it. I pretend to get the conversation started with her, but my 11 old son jumps in and interupts his father and gets very chatty with his mother, leaving me out of it. She will focus on him and ignore me ( perfect).
She won't see this coming.
Yet again if she finds out, I won't see her coming.
Campfire
-
welcome to my world.......close the door as you enter :'(
-
There is only one way this will end...badly :cup:
-
and thats when the fight started.! ;D ;D :cup:
-
I think your "in-the-sh7T-Ometer" is about to get blown off the dial................
Best advice is to hide all sharp and heavy objects...........
-
Anyone want to take bets when it will come crashing down
GG
Sent from my HTC Desire S using Tapatalk
-
Anyone want to take bets when it will come crashing down
GG
Sent from my HTC Desire S using Tapatalk
"Sent from my HTC Desire S using Tapatalk"
have you bolted from the house already mate >:D
hehehehehe
-
with an attitude like that i'm surprised your wife is bothering to stay - i certainly wouldn't..........
-
I'm hearing Ya Brother.
Man's Brain vs Woman's Brain (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LKveOsIieHg)
:cheers:
PS, I love my nothing Box ;D
-
Even if all in jest, you're a braver man than me Gunga Din.
-
Genius!! Good work mate
-
lol - mate my wife has ditched me .... and i still wouldn't have pulled that one.
-
When she finds out you ain't gonna get laid for a month!!! :cheers:
-
When she finds out you ain't gonna get laid for a month!!! :cheers:
You mean he will get laid out ;D
-
The worst thing is mate, she is never ever going to let you forget when she twigs.
-
Campfire, two points:
1. I think you're a clever bloke.
2. I hope you have top-level private health insurance, because you're gunna need it!
Cheers, Tony
-
You mean he will get laid out ;D
Probably a bit of both, then after a week I will have to start groveling again, a couple of expensive dinner nights out, clean out the garage and have to start ticking off her " to do list" around the house, so in theory a short term gain for a long term loss.
She gives back as good as she recieves, and she is pretty good with the jest/ humour.
Campfire
-
camp fire i have a spare room if you want you will just have to sleep with one of the cats
-
Abort the mission. I give you till about Tuesday She is going to wise up.
-
camp fire i have a spare room if you want you will just have to sleep with one of the cats
Are the cats feral, if so I could invite all the swaggers who contributed to the "What's your favourite .22 rimfire" Thread.
-
When she finds out you ain't gonna get laid for a month!!! :cheers:
My wife used to try that one, only she quoted several months. She really got the pig with me when I asked her " If I'm being punished, why is the date brought forward that far?"
That being said, when I built the son's cubby house, I made sure it was well sealed, and long enough to roll out my swag inside.
-
All I can say is Dead Man Walking !!! ;D
-
I have been with my missus for a tad over 5 years and never ever had one argument (and love it) But if she doesn’t get to go on the Cape York trip next year that could all change ;D
-
Humm All ya married guys and ya still haven,t worked out why the women closes her eyes during sex. Tinkera.
-
Campfire,
First of all........ i admire your creativness......... secondly however, I'm pretty sure you're gunna die........ if not when the Mrs finds out about the deal, i'm pretty sure your life will end when she finds out the world wide web knows your scheme!!!!......hehehe..... good luck!!
-
Humm All ya married guys and ya still haven,t worked out why the women closes her eyes during sex. Tinkera.
I close my eyes too and think:
Sunday arvo watching the footy with a few coldies
Letting loose at Bunnings & BCF
Caravans, camping, 4x4, fishing, boats and outdoor shows
Winning the lotto and taking a couple of years off to build a massive man shed with a bar, pool table, BBQ, massive TV screen, and still plenty of room to do a camper trailer home build, over a year, ( if I have a Bar, pool table then may need 2 years).
Your absolutely right Tinkera, it does help to close your eyes during s-x.
Glad to see somebody understands me.
Campfire
-
When she finds out you ain't gonna get laid for a month!!! :cheers:
Have heard this before but as I said to her, just let me know when the punishment starts so I can tell the difference ;D >:D
-
campfire there not feral but there do run the House
-
Acually in answer to the post title
1. "No darling that fishing rod/motorcycle part/MTB part I have had for a couple of years."
2. "No I dont have this issue of CTA, see it is this months. No I wont throw out all my old ones, they are good reference."
3. "You and your sister in law (anal retentive) are NOT allowed in my shed, ever, for any reason. Except to bring me a beer."
And the all time favourite, most common one
" No I am not perving on her, she is just so skinny, someone should feed her"
"Wearing that short skirt leaves nothing to the imagination, besides I dont like red high heels anyway"
-
I think when the Mrs finds out you wont see her for a week! then the swelling should go down just enough to see with one of your eyes!
-
This thread must be some kind of therapy or something.
If my wife didn't ask me questions; I'd be pretty bored and probably single.
-
Campfire, is the young bloke available for contract work ?
-
All i can say is walk around with your medicare card in your teeth it will make it easier for the ambos ;D
-
Acually in answer to the post title
1. "No darling that fishing rod/motorcycle part/MTB part I have had for a couple of years."
2. "No I dont have this issue of CTA, see it is this months. No I wont throw out all my old ones, they are good reference."
3. "You and your sister in law (anal retentive) are NOT allowed in my shed, ever, for any reason. Except to bring me a beer."
And the all time favourite, most common one
" No I am not perving on her, she is just so skinny, someone should feed her"
"Wearing that short skirt leaves nothing to the imagination, besides I dont like red high heels anyway"
;D
this would be shorter thread were it titled "things I don' get strife for".
-
Campfire, is the young bloke available for contract work ?
Gold.... ROTFLMAO :cheers:
-
It all depends on what your interpretation of trouble is. The way I interpret I can't be anything other than an angel all the time. :angel: ;D
Snow (Purpetually deluded)
-
NO NO NO Campfire it,s so they can,t see you enjoying yourself thats why eyes are closed. Tinkera.
-
My advice:-
Get yourself a good shovel; or at worst, get your blood type tatooed on to make it easier for the ambo's.
-
Gold.... ROTFLMAO :cheers:
Captain
You beat me to the punch, DNO all I can say " classic one liner mate" ROFLMAO along with the captain above.
When I get my arse kicked I will quote you to the missus as one last bruised act of defiance. Then I will limp away like a beaten man and tend to my wounds.
I'll ask the young fella if he up for contract work, he can also fetch beers as wells while your watching sport.
Cheers
Campfire ( about to be put out)
-
Hahahaha too funny Campfire its only the depth that varies!
Just make sure you step through the threshold quickly as you might avoid the door hitting you in the a@#e on the way out......LMAO!!
-
Humm All ya married guys and ya still haven,t worked out why the women closes her eyes during sex. Tinkera.
Yeah, cause ya's hate to see us enjoy ourselves.
;D
-
Yeah, cause ya's hate to see us enjoy ourselves.
;D
LOL ;D >:D :cheers: :cup:
-
with an attitude like that i'm surprised your wife is bothering to stay - i certainly wouldn't..........
Responding to your quote above
I'm glad you decided to leave, I don't even remember you arriving, I guess the boy did a better job than I expected, maybe I should give him a pay rise.... >:D
Campfire >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D
-
Touch'e
-
Yeah, cause ya's hate to see us enjoy ourselves.
;D
Nice one :cheers:
-
Trouble??
Arrived home last week with a single Hobie Kayak and all the fishing gear on it, strapped to the roof racks.
My darling met me at the door and said "What's the go? Where is mine?"
Quick response and a costly one at that , "Just dropping them off one at a time, until I can be sure two will travel safely on the roof racks together"
Quick turn around to get the other.
Boy, was the dealer impressed, and he gave me a discount on the second purchase and thru in a pink fishing rod.
I am the star around here at the moment!!!!
No trouble but close!!!
Alan
-
Trouble??
Arrived home last week with a single Hobie Kayak and all the fishing gear on it, strapped to the roof racks.
My darling met me at the door and said "What's the go? Where is mine?"
Quick response and a costly one at that , "Just dropping them off one at a time, until I can be sure two will travel safely on the roof racks together"
Quick turn around to get the other.
Boy, was the dealer impressed, and he gave me a discount on the second purchase and thru in a pink fishing rod.
I am the star around here at the moment!!!!
No trouble but close!!!
Alan
Mate that's impressive, I wouldn't have thought of that, probably used some other lame excuse, and I know how much it costs for a Hobie these days. I bought my kayak home with all the accessories in bits and pieces over a couple of months so the impact didn't look at as bad. She got suspicious when I had an electric motor in the garage she hadn't seen yet.
Mate I would have been truely impressed if you said it was a Hobie AI with all the accessories x 2 for his and her.
What model did you buy,
On a separate note I just picked up the brand new edition of Blade magazine today ( kayakfishing) , some nice rigs in that edition including one for duck hunters with a built in shotgun carrier ( yank import ).
Hobbies are great rigs and I do like the trimaran set up with sail. Was tempted to buy the pro angler but didn't have the budget ( home renovations) at the time.
Got a nice Cobra yak instead.
Cheers
Campfire
-
Reply from Mrs Bj76....
If it was me and I caught on, I'd be paying him more money than you, to annoy you more than I was before. Oh, and forget about sex for like...maybe forever!!!! Have fun when she finds out.
Mrs BJ76
---
I am here: http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=-27.212881,153.010122
-
your a dead man walking camp fire ;D yup it's just the depth that varies. I scored this arvo, got to go out 4wding with some of the boys, only catch was to take our 5yr old son with me ( he loves it ) she was feeling a bit crook, and wanted a quiet arvo. scored twice got browny points for taking the boy out with me ;D :cup:
troy
-
Reply from Mrs Bj76....
If it was me and I caught on, I'd be paying him more money than you, to annoy you more than I was before. Oh, and forget about sex for like...maybe forever!!!! Have fun when she finds out.
Mrs BJ76
---
I am here: http://maps.google.com/maps?ll=-27.212881,153.010122
Gee,s Campfire your getting a few nibbles from the fairer sex here mate and you know how women have a nack of finding things out.Mrs BJ76 give the guy a break, guys need ME time to. Tinkera.
-
Gee,s Campfire your getting a few nibbles from the fairer sex here mate and you know how women have a nack of finding things out.Mrs BJ76 give the guy a break, guys need ME time to. Tinkera.
It's all fun and games, I've put my head in the convict stocks (Online thread) with the topic of choice, so I expect to get a few rotten tomatoes thrown at me by some passing by.
Once she finds out, I will be out of the stocks and getting flogged with the "cat of nine tails "
Then maybe a firing squad
Followed by some more flogging
Then hung, drawn and quartered
And no s-x in between
Cheers
Campfire ;D
-
You know when you have upset her...she yells & screams at you. However, when you really, really piss her off, you get the "silent" treatment......personally, I think that the extra effort is worth it.
Hem
-
personally, I think that the extra effort is worth it.
Hem
Yep,
;D
-
BREATHING
BERT
-
BREATHING
Yeah, been told that's my worst habit at times.
;D
-
Trouble??
Arrived home last week with a single Hobie Kayak and all the fishing gear on it, strapped to the roof racks.
My darling met me at the door and said "What's the go? Where is mine?"
Quick response and a costly one at that , "Just dropping them off one at a time, until I can be sure two will travel safely on the roof racks together"
Quick turn around to get the other.
Boy, was the dealer impressed, and he gave me a discount on the second purchase and thru in a pink fishing rod.
I am the star around here at the moment!!!!
No trouble but close!!!
Alan
Mate, you are not out of it yet. My wife is a secretary, and so will go over all accounts etc pretty finely. She WOULD have picked up on the two receipts, the seperate times etc. I would not have gotten away with this, and of course, the expense.
-
You know when you have upset her...she yells & screams at you. However, when you really, really piss her off, you get the "silent" treatment......personally, I think that the extra effort is worth it.
Hem
WOW your right, once that happens, I won't need the boy anymore, thus make him redundant and save on pocket money. Win win scenario...... >:D :cup: >:D
Campfire :cheers:
-
AGAIN spending to long on here with you loverlies ...AUNTY JACK